Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
