And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Randomize
