So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
I wanna passion pit in your ass
He is an equal opportunity slut.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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