What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
