operation harelip BJ is a go
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
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i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
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