bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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