I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Randomize
