If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
