Whoa Z and x make the same sound
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
These tits shall not be calmed
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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