It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Randomize