my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
