dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Randomize
