Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
