Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Randomize
