Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I am naked and annoyed.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
