Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
