Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
