Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
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