Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
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