Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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