Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Randomize
