She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
