I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Randomize
