I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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