Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
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