its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
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