this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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