Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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