every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
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