so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
what day is it and did you see me today?
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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