Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
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