im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
