I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
