If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
