That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
