i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Randomize
