sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
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