anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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