those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
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