escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
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