Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
