Screwed.edu
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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