So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
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