Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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