At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
Randomize
