we made out on top of his cat.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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