youre lurking in front of me
Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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