wakey wakey hands off snakey
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Randomize