my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Randomize
