That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Randomize
