What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
she told me i tasted like america
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize