come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
